Denial
by gravitysabully
Summary: [Humanstuck. DavexJohn.] Your name is John Egbert and you have a little, teensey-weensey gay crush on Dave. A very small one. But Dave is oblivious while that little crush begins to grow. You might just be a full-blown homosexual. All for your best friend that doesn't notice. [#TW: guyxguy]
1. Not Gay, Even for Dave

**This is a one-shot that I wrote that I decided to write a story about. Hope you enjoy it.**

* * *

Your name is John Egbert, and you are not a homosexual. No matter what your friends say, you are not gay. Not even for your best friend, Dave Strider, who might just be the greatest person alive.

But you're not gay. You don't love the fleeting moments when your hands touch. You don't love when the sun shines at his dirty blond hair at just the right angle and makes it look like golden thread. You don't love how he trashes your movie taste, especially _Con Air_. You don't love any of those things. You're not a homo.

You're not a homo even though your heart tightens when you see Dave flirting with Terezi. Not a homo, not gay.

You're not gay even though you love how he offers you a seat on his lap when all other chairs are taken. It's perfectly normal for a friend to love characteristics of a friend, right? See, you're not a homo.

When you walk into a room and see that Dave's there, it's perfectly fine to want him right by your side. You're "best bros", as he puts it. Of course you want to be near him.

For a friend to share food with a friend when they're alone at a diner is not gay. You see best friends do this all the time in movies, although they get together at the end. Still, you're not gay.

When you and Dave have sleepovers, or as Dave and his bro call it, "guy's night", you borrow his shirts in the morning if you forget your clothes. You _definitely _don't like how the shirts still smell like Dave after washing them a few times. And you most certainly do _not _keep the shirts after you said you'd return them and wear them to bed. Nope. You're not gay.

You're not gay even though when Karkat dared Dave to kiss you and felt nervous that he wouldn't enjoy it.

Not a homosexual.

You felt fireworks explode in your chest as your lips met. You didn't want for it to end.

Not gay.

You still felt Dave's lips on your own even as you lay on your bed, hours later. Not gay, you think. Not a homo. But as you roll over, you forget your mantra and wish that Dave had his arms around your waist, laying here with you.

You sigh. You might be just a little gay for Dave. Not totally, but just a little, tiny smidgen gay for Dave.

* * *

**That's a wrap! Okay, you know the drill. Click that review button! If you want another chapter, tell me in a review! If you liked/loved it, put it in a review! If you hate it, write a review! **_**Realizations **_**will be updated in a week, according to the number of reviews I got so far...**

**0-5 reviews: two weeks till update**

**6-10 reviews: one week till update**

**11+ reviews: this week**

**Adios, readers!**

**-Kato**


	2. Need to Get it Under Control

**Here's Chap. 2! How are you guys liking this so far? I think it's coming along nicely...**

* * *

You roll out of bed slowly. You hit the alarm that's blaring the _Ghost Busters_ theme. You sigh.

It was a rough night for you. It was filled with dreams of you and Dave. Doing boyfriend things. It kind of scared you how after just admitting your _slight _gayness, you're already having dreams about marrying your best friend.

You pulled on a green shirt, blue jeans, and black Converse. The basic outfit you've worn all year, but you feel like it's different. Maybe because you remember that Dave said that he liked this particular shirt on you awhile ago in the back of your mind. But this has nothing to do with why you're wearing it.

You're only a little gay, remember? You have a lovely girlfriend, right? You shake your head. She wasn't exactly a lovely person, but Vriska was nice enough. You tried to get her to stop picking on Tavros, a boy who sits in a wheelchair, but that didn't go so well.

You shrug. Is it possible to like two people at once? Or can you only like one at a time? So does this mean that you don't like Vriska anymore? This whole thing was getting too confusing.

You bounded down the stairs while thinking this over. Your dad had set up breakfast before going to work.

"Daaad," you groan. All he had put out are all of his cakes. The cakes that you sneak into the garbage can. You honestly don't know how your mom could stand all his baking needs.

You grab a Poptart instead of eating your dad's shitty cakes, if you could even call them that. The clock on the oven read eyes widened and you ran to your room to get your backpack. You dashed out the door still munching on your breakfast. The bus leaves at 7:45. You got 4, now 3, minutes to get to the bus stop a block away. Dave's block.

Your heart does a little jig in your chest as you turned the corner onto his street. Maybe he'll take the bus today. Then he'll sit next to you. And then you can admire the way his lips move as they form words. Maybe then you can lean over and- stop it right there, Egbert. You need to get this crush under control.

You try to shake those thoughts out of your head as you climbed onto the bus. You search for Dave's golden head, and you find it. Just not where you thought it would be.

The object of your small affection is sitting with his cherry-red haired girlfriend and her albino friend, Karkat. Your heart tightens a little. Snap out of it, John! It's okay if Dave wants to sit with his other friends. He doesn't belong to you.

_Not yet,_ another voice in your head counters. You finally accept it. You are insane. You trudge to the back of the bus. You sit alone. You would sit with Vriska if she went on this bus. She doesn't. You would sit with Jade and Rose, but they're sharing a seat with Kanaya, who is Rose's current girlfriend.

You sigh. This would be a long bus ride.

* * *

When you get off the bus, you hear a deep voice call, "Egderp! Wait up!"

You don't turn around. You know who it is. When Dave catches up to you, he gives you a half-smile and says, "Hey."

"Hey," you say back. You're trying to fight off a blush even though you can feel it creeping up your face.

You make small talk with your best bro until you come to your locker. Vriska's already waiting for you, waiting to go to Chemistry.

"Joooooooohn," she whines. You wince slightly at her soprano voice. She walks up to you and gives you a little shove. "Where were you? I had to wait by your locker and I had to talk to _Ampora _because I was blocking his locker, even though I clearly wasn't..."

You let Vriska ramble on about how much she hates Eridan Ampora. The exchange student really gave you no trouble, but Vriska hates him and his stutter. A lot. You would say that they had something between them if you weren't dating Vriska. But if you get together with Dave...

_Not if, when!, _the pesky voice says again.

You really need to find a way to minimize this crush.

You roll out of bed slowly. You hit the alarm that's blaring the GHOST BUSTERS theme. You sigh.

* * *

**How am I doing as a writer? Thanks to everyone who followed, favorited, and reviewed ****_Not a Homo, Not Gay _****and made this story possible. You know what to do! If you hated it, review! If you liked it, review! If you LOVED it, review! Any suggestions? Tell me in a review! **

**Goodbye, dear readers!**

**Valete, (Goodbye in Latin)**

**Kato**


	3. Not Totally a Homosexual

**Sorry for the shortness/suckiness. I really wanted to get this one chapter finished so I could work on ****_Realizations._**** Some one came up with a brilliant idea! I want to know if you think this is a good idea: should I have ****_Denial _****and ****_Realizations_**** intertwined? So, it would be ****_Denial _****as the DaveJohn part of this Humanstuck and ****_Realizations _****as the Karezi part. It would be two stories with the same things and events going on, but two storylines. **

**Anyway, on with the show!**

* * *

**As soon as you get out of Chemistry, you make a dash for English. The first class you have with Dave. **

Argh! You have to stop thinking about the cool kid! At least you're not sitting in between Vriska and Eridan anymore... Those two constantly argued and the girl behind you- Nepeta, you believe- went on and on about how "purrfect" they were for each other.

Torture. Pure torture.

You plopped down into your seat just as Dave walked into the room. The butterflies in your stomach were seeking release when he sat beside you.

"Sup," he says, nodding his head.

"Nothing," you squeak back. Your voice was all high, like a school girl's when their crush says 'hi'. Oh... The simile was exactly correct in this case.

Dave looks at you strangely before you start rambling about movies until Mr. Vantas, Karkat's brother, told you all very politely, that "the noise might be very triggering to some people and that you should all shut up before someone comes in and complains, which makes me look bad, which triggers me, which makes me look bad yet again." He was very talkative. And annoying. There was a reason other staff members *cough* Meenah *cough* called him the "Insufferable".

You could hardly stay focused on the lesson and the long speeches Mr. Vantas gave about everything. Stupid Dave was sitting next to you with his stupid shades making your stupid heart flutter. Stupid...

"John."

You were daydreaming. Dave had just been dumped by Terezi and you were comforting him.

"John."

You lean in and remove the shades. You lean in even closer.

"John."

Your lips meet and-

"Mr. Egbert! Do you know how _triggering _it is when you don't pay attention?" Mr. Vantas asked, trying to look intimidating. His red oversized sweater was making that hard for him to achieve.

"Yes, sir," you answer, hoping to dodge detention and a lengthy scolding.

* * *

Lunch. Your favorite part of the day. But right now it wasn't. You're sandwiched in between Dave and Vriska. And Karkat's sulking. And Terezi is sniffing shit. And Tavros and Gamzee are rapping. You shudder. Dave can put them both to shame.

There he is again, clogging up your thoughts. Get. Out. Imaginary. Dave. Who. Likes. Me. But. The. Real. One. Does. Not. And. Will. Never. Like. Me. With each word, you pretend you are banging your head against the table.

"Joooooooohn? You okay?" Vriska asked, placing a hand on your arm.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" you reply, a little worried. Did you accidentally voice your thoughts?

"You sure, bro? You were banging your head against the table for a while," Dave said. _Take off your damn shades! Are you concerned or not? Let me see your eyes, dammit! _John thought. Then realized what he had been doing.

Oops...

"Retard," Karkat muttered.

"Karkles! Be nice!" Terezi scolded. As much as you dislike her for dating Dave, she's really cool at times.

Karkat grumbled something under his breath, but complied.

You turn back to your lunch.

_Only a little gay, only a little gay, not a total homosexual..._

* * *

**Sorry if this chapter sucked. My deadline for updating my Karezi fanfic is in two days and I still haven't finished the chapter. **

**Anywho, tell me what you think of intertwining ****_Denial _****and ****_Realizations_****. Tell me if I nailed it or failed it this update. (jacksfilms) Tell me if you love it, tell me if you hate it.**

**Peace, **

**Kato**

**PS. I'm trying to come up with a better sign-off name. Review or PM with any ideas.**


	4. A Plan in Mind

**Sorry for the long-ish wait. I've been kinda busy. (Hint: watching ****_The Most Popular Girls in School_****.) But here it is. I tried to make it longer. **

**-Kato**

* * *

You walk out of lunch with your cheeks flushed bright red. You were so close to revealing a tiny detail about your sexuality.

_ "You sure you're okay?" Dave asked. You nodded your head. You turned back to your lunch. "You positive, bro?" You nod again. You can feel Dave getting frustrated. _

_Suddenly there's a firm hand under your chin, jerking your head to look at its owner: Dave. _

_"Dammit, John! Is there anything wrong?" His breath came out in puffs. You could feel it on your face. Blush creeps up your cheeks. You must be as red as a tomato by now._

_"N-no," you stammer. Being this close- so close that if you leaned forward, you could kiss him- was making you feel... different. When you were this close with Vriska, you felt tiny electric tingles throughout your body. At first, though. The electricity died down after time._

_This, however, was a fucking firework show. Your chest was the grand finale, your heart was beating so fast._ How can he have this affect on me? _you think. _

_"Are you sure?" His breath sent shivers down your spine. _

_"A-abosol-lutely." You're stammering again! Get it together, John! _

_To your disappointment, he lets go of your chin and turns to talk to Terezi. Leaving you alone, as if nothing happened_.

You shook your head, trying to erase that memory. _You were so close_, that little voice says inside of you. You nodded your head in agreement. But if you went through with it and connected your lips, you would've ruined your close-to-none chances, not to mention your friendship!

You walk over to your locker and twist the lock to spin to the right combination: 4-13-9. You grab your History books and head over to Ms. Maryam's classroom.

She was a good teacher, and really young. This was your favorite class right behind English. But no matter how much you loved History, you zoned out until he heard Eridan talking to Karkat a few rows to the left of you.

"Uh, Kar?" you hear Eridan whisper.

"What do you want?" Karkat is clearly still in a sour mood from lunch.

"Howw do you ask a girl out?" The hipster sounded nervous. Is he trying to get tips on how to ask Feferi Peixes out? Everyone- even Jade- knows about Eridan's crush on her.

"Depends on who it is." Karkat was actually helping? That was a first.

"Let's say it's a girl wwho's datin' someone and she may or may not hate me." So it wasn't Feferi. So who- oh, no.

"Throw rocks at her window and sing to her," Karkat said sarcastically. Why did Eridan like her?

"I'm bein' serious, Kar," Eridan whined.

"Well I'm not." And with that, Karkat turned around and the conversation was over.

Eridan huffed and crossed his arms like a pouty toddler. Why would he, out of all people, have a crush on your girlfriend? He hated her, and she hated him. It was common knowledge! But... maybe this could work towards your advantage.

By setting Vriska up with Eridan, he would be giving the poor sap a chance and then you'll end your relationship with her. Then, maybe, you could start something with Dave? But not until he ends things with Terezi... You grin widely. You know someone who could help with this plan.

When class lets out, you go straight to this person's locker. You're still not sure if they'll help, but it can't hurt to ask. When you see their white hair come down the hallway, you lean against their locker.

"Hey, Karkat!"

* * *

**I have to say I like where this is going. So, how do you think Karkat will react? To see his point of view on this, check out ****_Realizations _****in a day or two. I'll update when I can. I'm thinking of writing another one-shot...**

**R34D 4ND R3V13W! :]**

**-Kato**


	5. A Break-Up Doesn't Always Break a Heart

**Hey guys! I'm pretty sure this is the longest chapter I've written. Sorry if it's too fast-paced. I had to get somewhere in the plot. Anyway, ****_Realizations _****should be updated soon. Enjoy this chapter! **

**VOILA! CHAPTER DE FOUR!**

* * *

"Hey, Karkat!" you say with as much enthusiasm as you can muster.

"Go away, douche muffin," he growls. You aren't surprised. This is Karkat's usual response.

"No. I have something to tell you," you sing, trying to make it sound appealing and not sound gay.

"Tell what it is so I know if it's important or not." He turned to face you. You take a deep breath, planning what you're going to say without giving away your true intentions.

"It's about Terezi." You see a certain look in his eyes. Something that looked almost like... admiration? Hope? Maybe even- do you dare say it- love? You take note of it.

"What about her?" your friend asked cautiously. You were treading on unfamiliar ground now.

"I need your help to um, break her and Dave up." You wince, noticing how pathetic that sounded. Something broke inside Karkat's eyes. Did he like Dave as well? He was great and all, but this could mess everything up!

"No," he answered, his voice hard. "Don't you have a girlfriend?"

You looked at the ground bashfully at this statement. "I'm breaking up with her. I don't see how Eri-" You cut yourself off. You don't want Karkat to know you heard that conversation.

"Eridan? I don't see how either. She's kind of bitchy, no offense."

"None taken." You stand in a moment of pure silence and awkwardness. "So... are you going to help me or not?"

"No," Karkat answered coldly. He turned on his heel and walked away to his next class.

This was going to be harder than you thought.

* * *

"Joooooooohn." You sigh and slump in your seat. Besides Chemistry, you shared a Roboyics class with Vriska. You were currently zoning out of Zahhak's explanation of how you make robotic prosthetics.

"What?" you whisper back.

"I'm boooooooored."

"Who isn't? Um, Vriska," you start, gathering up the courage to say what comes next. "We need to talk."

"What is it?" Worry shines in her eyes and she grabs a hold of your arm. You want her to let go so she won't pull it off in rage.

"I think we should, um, be just... friends?" For the second time that day, you wince. But not from how your voice sounded. It was because Vriska had your arm in a death grip.

"What. Did you just say?" she asked, disbelief coating her voice. She didn't wait for an answer. Her nails dug into your skin. You bit your lip a little bit. You should've known this would happen.

"We've been dating for eight fucking months and you break up with me NOW?! In the middle of the fucking class? What kind of douche does that? You do! Well, guess what, Joooooooohn," she says mockingly, "I. Don't. Care." And she exits the room.

"Miss Serket! Come back her right now!" Zahhak says in his quiet but demanding voice. But she didn't come back. You knew this would happen, but you still did it. Why are you so stupid?

* * *

Once you exit the classroom of torture, you head to Drama with Mr. Ampora, but he insists you call him Cronos. Nothing really happened until Eridan tapped you on the shoulder. You turned around and gave him a questioning look.

"Quick question, John," he said. His older brother was currently acting out a scene from _Grease_. He claimed it was the best musical to ever be on stage.

"What is it, Ampora?" you asked, slightly annoyed. You weren't really paying attention to the horrendous acting, but you were planning out how to break Dave and Terezi up. You needed a serious reality check to make these plans work because the Ghost Busters wouldn't come and say that Terezi's a ghost.

"How-w did you ask V-vrisk out?" He blushed a little. So he was making a move already?

"I just went up and asked her. She likes that, I guess." He nodded with the statement. Eridan leaned back in his seat and resumed watching _Grease_ for the hundredth time this week.

* * *

"Egderp!" You were finally out of Drama when you heard Karkat calling you.

"Egderp, you know that plan you were talking about? Well, I'm in."

You smiled widely at Karkat.

"You sure? You can't back out."

"I'm sure. I'm so sure I would go up to TZ now and ask her out to break them up."

You laugh a bit. "Okay."

"What do I do?" he asked eagerly. He was about ready to jump up and down, like a little kid on Christmas morning.

"Convince Terezi to break up with Dave."

He nodded just as the bell rang. You smiled at the shorter teen before walking in Miss Latula's Math class.

* * *

You were sitting near Nepeta. Again. She asked how Vriska reacted when you broke up with her and why you broke up with her and was there someone else. Standard things. _How does news travel so fast?_ You sigh and get back to work on your plan outline.

It's going to need a code name...

* * *

You went to your locker at the end of the day. You survived a crush, a plan, a friend that changes his mind way too often, a break up, a desperate hipster, and a horrible reenacting of Grease. And you escaped with no homework. You'd say you did pretty well today.

You head out for the doors when you see Karkat connect his lips to Terezi's. That wasn't supposed to happen yet...

* * *

**I just reread that chapter. It was so shitty. Anyway, read and review! If you hated this chapter, review! If you thought it was okay, review! If it was the best one yet, review! If I made a mistake or two, review! **

**i just want to take a little time and thank everyone who's reading this story and kept with it from the start. I'd really like to thank my buds TotaltotheMax, CardsofQuadrants, and colbatMneusmnye for reading over some of my stuff and getting me started here in the first place. I also want to thank all the people who reviewed and favorited/followed me or this story! It really makes me happy to think that so many people enjoy my writing! **

**Okay. Sap overload. So...**

**Byes, **

**Kato **


	6. Something's Up

**Hey, guys! Sorry for the wait! I've been SUPER busy this week.**

**Disclaimer: (I forgot to do this. Whoops!) I don't own Homestuck.**

* * *

You walked home, wondering how Karkat could do that. He could've messed the whole thing up! Dave could have seen them and- you didn't even want to think about it.

Once you got inside the house, you ignored the meat cakes sitting on the table for dinner and trudged up to your room. Your computer was already on, Pesterchum open. There were a few messages from Dave...

Your heart started beating a little quicker than it should be when you saw his red words on the screen.

* * *

[techturnGodhead began pestering ectoBiologist at ?:?]

TG: john

TG: tz is acting weird

TG: do you know anything

TG: john

TG: dammit

TG: answer me

TG: im trying to talk to my best bro here

TG: but hes too busy partying with alien hookers to talk to his bro ever since first grade

TG: thats cool man

* * *

You bit your lip. Terezi was acting weird? Was it after- Karkat's an idiot.

* * *

[ectoBiologist began pestering turntechGodhead at ?:?]

EB: she was acting fine at lunch today

EB: do you mean after school?

TG: yeah

TG: she was all biting her lip and shit and not acting like her

TG: shes like a lovesick puppy right now

EB: did you ask her about it?

* * *

This was bad. Karkat put the whole plan in jeopardy! Dave would catch on soon!

* * *

TG: yeah

TG: gtg

TG: bros being a bitch and pussy

TG: lil cals just staring at the computer too

EB: bye, dave!

* * *

You sigh. That was a little too close for comfort. Dave's suspicion, you mean. Dave could never be too close- and you snap a lid on the homosexual thoughts.

You look at the clock and see that the time is 5:30. It took you an hour and a half to walk home. Damn Tavros... Couldn't stay out of the puddle...

You head downstairs and indulge yourself in one of your dad's pies. They aren't as bad as his cakes. In your opinion, that is.

* * *

You are now temporarily Dave Strider. You frown at the computer screen. John knows something. It wasn't obvious, but you knew he was hiding something. You always do. Call it a talent.

You open up a new window of Pesterchum to pester one of your rapping buddies to see if he could help you.

* * *

[turntechGodhead began pestering adiosToreader at ?:?]

TG: hey tav

AT: uH, HI dAVE

TG: sup

AT: nOTHING MUCH, UH, bRO

TG: quick question

TG: just to help a bro out

TG: is john acting weird or is it just me

AT: uH, i'M NOT SURE, bUT, UH, HE WAS ACTING OUT OF CHARACTER WHEN i SAW HIM WALKING HOME.

TG: thanks bro

AT: uH, nO PROBLEM, dAVE

[turntechGodhead ceased pestering adiosToreader at ?:?]

* * *

So it wasn't just you...

* * *

You are now back to being John Egbert. You hope you don't have dreams like... last night's again. Waking up with a boner is a bad way to start the day.

* * *

**That was short. Anyway, I'm working on a one-shot Trilogy, the first in it being ****_Starbucks_****. It's a quick little DirkJake thing. The next one is based off of ****_Rufio, Don't Call the Cops _****by Broadway Roxy. The last one will probably be RoseMary or a competition between Sollux and Eridan for Fef, but I'm leaning towards RoseMary. **

**Okay, so my friend colbatMnemosyne refuses to post anything here on . She's a really good author, so please review here is you want her to post something or PM her. She's on my Fav Authors list. **

**If you loved it, review. If you hated it, review. If you have suggestions, review. If you want Colbat to post something, REVIEW!**

**Goodbye,**

**Kato**


	7. What Did I Do?

**Hey guys. I have no excuse for this ridiculously long wait except for my own laziness. Thank Keeblo for this, she got me off my ass to write this. She's also are a really good writer, so check her out! Keeblo's an awesome friend, too.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own** _**Homestuck**__._

* * *

You are now Dave Strider. You just woke up from a rather... unusual dream. It was all shits and giggles till the frog showed up. Yup, it was a different kind of nightmare.

You got up and ran your hand through your hair. You ponder the same question as last night: why is John acting so weird? You need to know, it's driving you crazy.

* * *

You come downstairs to find Bro talking to Lil' Cal. That's normal, you think to yourself as you grab a bag of Doritos. You know it's not healthy- John has told you so for many years- but this is your first Dorito breakfast in a month. After all, YOLO.

You ignored the conversation between your mentally unstable Bro and his creepy-ass puppet until you leave the room. Then you hear your name.

"I know, dude. I've tried so hard to show Lil' Man." Silence. "I don't know if he likes him back!" Silence. "I can't go up to his dad! You know about my... problems with him." And, what a surprise silence. You shrugged and walked away. That was kinda ironic that the super cool dude is talking to a puppet. Yup, irony. Take notes.

Then your thoughts turn to more serious business. What was Bro trying to show you? Just add that to the long list of Life Questions of Dave Strider, you think. You walk into the bathroom and freshen up before going to school.

* * *

You were now on the bus, looking for a place to sit. You spot a head of black in the back seat of the bus. You walk over there and plop yourself down beside John.

"Sup, Egbert," you say to your best bro.

"H-hi, Dave," he stutters. A pale pink settles over his skin, and you can't help but notice it looks good on him. When TZ blushes, her's is a full out red blush that dominates her pale skin.

"Hot in here?" you ask, inquiring about his pink face. His eyes widen to the size of dinner plates and he looked slightly... embarrassed?

"Um, yeah. A bit." What is wrong with him? He's usually blabbing about some shitty movie, like Con Air. It all really started yesterday... Wait! Was it because of the dared kiss?

* * *

_You, John, and a couple of other people were bored, so you all met up at Karkat's. You tried to get through a screening of Fever Pitch, but you couldn't do it. Nope. It wasn't going to happen. So, being the idiot you are, you suggested the childish game called Truth-or-Dare._

_After a couple of weenie dares and "revealing" truths, Karkat asked you the question: "Truth or Dare?" _

_"Dare." You weren't a pussy. Karkat seemed to ponder over this for a while before deciding on a dare. _

_"Kiss. John." You shrugged and leaned over to John. He whimpered a little, showing you his fear. Behind your shades, you gave him a reassuring look. Then you came even closer. _

_When you finally connected lips with your best bro, there was a flame dancing in your heart, warming you from the inside out. It was similar to what you felt when you were with Terezi, but it was not nearly this powerful. You took initiative, deepening the kiss. You turned your head and reached your hand behind his neck, pulling him closer._

_You couldn't help yourself. It felt so good, so... right. You felt John move his arms from the ground into your hair. With every turn of your head, he pulled tighter and tighter. Eventually, you both ran out of air, but the kiss lasted a good minute._

_"No homo," John whispered breathlessly after you pulked away for good. _

* * *

"Dude, if this is about the kiss, don't worry about it." That should call him down, right?

"That-that's- what? What about the kiss?" John said, perking up a bit after the mention of the kiss. _Okay..._ you think.

"If you're all weird because of that dare, don't worry about it," you say trying to calm him down. "The kiss meant nothing to me."

John's face deflated in front of your eyes. His eyes seemed to drain of light at your statement. _What did I say? _

The bus came to a stop. You were at school.

"You alright, man?" you ask, reaching out to touch his shoulder. He bats it away.

"Just peachy," he says in a hurt voice. He gets up and shuffles off the bus.

You sit there, completely in shock. What just happened...?

* * *

**Dave, why must you be this way? I'm really sorry for the long wait. A quick shout-out to my internet buddies: Roses-of-Envy and Keeblo. Please check them out, they're amazing. **

**I know this sounds kinda sad, but I was a little sad that I only got so many reviews. Thanks soo much to those of you that did. You made my day. Also, thanks for all the follows and the favorites, you guys. **

**Read and Review!**

**-Kato**

**PS. I just saw that my story had over 1,700 views! YOU GUYS ARE SO AWESOME! You have no idea how happy I am right now!**


	8. Coming out of the Closet

**Why do I do this to myself?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own ****_Homestuck_****. But I still want to.**

* * *

Your name is John Egbert and you are broken. Your heart is heavy in your chest as you fight back the tears. The kiss meant... Nothing? What about the sparks? _No one can tell me he didn't feel that!_ You fought back the tears and held your head high.

"Fuckass!" You turn around and see a head of white hair behind you. Karkat took one look at your face and asked, "What the fuck happened?" Your bottom lip starts to tremble as Dave's words echo through your head. _The kiss... It meant nothing to me... _

"Dave's a prick," you say, wiping at your eyes.

"Tell me something I don't know," Karkat grumbled. "What'd he do?"

You look around you to see if the cool kid was anywhere near you before pulling Karkat into an empty classroom.

"Can I tell you something?" you ask. You bit your lip nervously.

"No. I'm the last fucking person you'd confide in," the albino said sarcastically.

"I-I-"

"Spit it out."

"I'm gay," you whisper quietly.

"What?" Confusion was plastered on Karkat's face.

"I'm gay. I'm a homosexual." Karkat was gaping like a fice, trying to find something to say.

"Who-who-"

"Who am I gay for?" you say, cutting him off. You take a deep breath, trying to find the courage say the name, but you couldn't say it. "The person who's a prick."

Karkat was still staring at you. He never expected this, since you always denied the possibility that you were not straight. You kind of regret that now. You have no chance with Dave.

"You could've fucking told me that before! That's what the whole plan is about, isn't it?" You nodded shamefully, turning your gaze to the red. Your cheeks grew redder. "You should have fucking said something! I thought you were after TZ!" You stifled a chuckle. Why would you like Terezi? She was cool and all, but Dave... Dave was Dave. But he was also an ignorant prick.

* * *

"John!" You hear a voice calling for you somewhere behind you, but you didn't answer. You were mad at the voice. "John!" it calls again. You continue ignoring it. "Egderp!" A hand has a strong grip on your shoulder so you can't keep walking. _Shit... _

"John," Dave said, sounding kind of relieved, "why wouldn't you answer me."

You look away from the shades-wearing boy that had stomped on your heart oh-so nonchalantly. "I didn't hear you." There was a certain hardness in your voice that seemed to make Dave flinch a bit.

"Are we cool man? You're my best bro. I can't stand losing you." You nod and walk off to Chemistry.

You were best bros. That's all. You couldn't stop that single tear from rolling down your cheek.

* * *

Your name is Dave Strider and you watched John walk away in shock. Why was he mad at you? What did you do this time?

It wasn't like he was angry at you like the time you tried playing a prank on him. He was going to ask Vriska out, and you couldn't help feel a stab of hurt in your heart when he told you. So you were stupid and tried to ruin his chances.

You know how immature and not cool it is now, but that hurt you felt controlled you in that moment. You snuck up behind John as he was popping the question, and pulled down his pants. He was so mad at you, but Spiderbitch still said yes. You can't imagine why he broke up with her. They seemed so happy together.

You shrugged it off and walked to Science.

* * *

**DAVE JUST REALIZE YOUR FEELINGS, GOD DAMMIT! I'm yelling at my own fanfic. *facepalms* I hope you like this chapter. **

**My friend Dreamittobelieveit or something like that is new to this website. I would love it if you guys would check out her fanfic ****_Folded_****_Cards_**** and give her some pointers!**

**Read and Review! Thanks for all the support and everything you guys have done! **

**Until Next Time,**

**Kato**


	9. A Dawn of Realization and Stupidity

**Can I take a moment to say how awesome you guys are? 65 reviews. 49 followers. 23 favorites. Over 2,900 views. You guys make me feel so good, you have no idea!**

**There's an amazing author on this website whose pen name is Eliza Be Good. She's so talented, so please check out her stories! Especially ****_Sneak_****! :]**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, just the plot. I don't own ****_Ghost Busters_****, either.**

* * *

Your name is Dave Strider and you are sitting in Science next to TZ. She isn't really paying attention to you, which you're okay with. You really need time to think some things over.

Like what happened with John this morning. He never acted that way unless Vriska was around, but that was before they were dating. And he was hurt. Really hurt. You couldn't tell why. Bro had never taught you how to read into emotions, only to hide your own.

You think about how red his cheeks were. How it looked so derpy and adorable on him that you just wanted to hug him. It was never like that with Terezi. Whenever she blushed, you just kind of laughed it off or didn't respond. That feeling never happened when you were around Terezi.

But with John... John it was like a dream you never wanted to wake up from. You had a brief moment of remembering the kiss, and you just couldn't help but smile. Not one of your little smirks, but the smile you only wore around your best bro.

You remember when you met him like yesterday. You were on the playground on the first day of school. (You still wore Bro's dumb-ass pointy shades then. What were you thinking?) A new kid was in your grade, and he wasn't that cool. He still hadn't lost his baby fat and he wore these weird glasses and Ghost Busters shirt. You really didn't have any friends, but you weren't sure that you wanted to be friends with him. Until you started playing with him. You realized he was actually really cool with all that talk about ghosts and pranks and shit. He was pretty damn cool.

Your grin grew a little bit wider. You reached up and touched the shades that John got you. You finally became yourself after that. You broke out of Bro's shadow and became Dave. Not some Bro copy. He was really your best friend.

Then you start remembering when you pantsed the poor derp. That little stab of hurt had took control of your body. You try to remember what it felt like exactly. It was sharp, quick, and... envious. Almost like jealousy. You shook your head. Why would you be jealous of John? You didn't even remotely like Vriska that much. What did you have to be jealous about? Vriska saying yes? That's ab-

You were jealous. It finally dawned on you. You were jealous of Vriska for having John's attention. But you still hung out with him. He always made time for you. So maybe you weren't jealous of the attention, just the affection. The affecti- It hit you like a ton of bricks.

You were in love with John. Mr. "No-Fucking-Homo". You loved him. Well, shit. There's no way he'd like you back. He's "not a homosexual". He's "not gay". He's perfectly straight and perfect in every other way. You sigh. You have really screwed yourself over this time.

When the bell rings, you wait for John to get out of Chemistry. You wonder if- maybe one day- he'll be like, "I'm a homosexual!" and just come up and press his lips to yours. You would like that a lot. In fact, you liked the idea so much that when John came up to you, you did it.

It was even better than the first time, even though it was a lot shorter. The chaste meeting of lips gave you this certain drive. It made you feel like you could do anything.

You pulled away and saw that John's face was the shade of red it was on the bus. He was biting his lip, his blue eyes wide.

"No homo?" he asks, and your whole world shatters.

You storm away, face impassive. You were such an idiot! As if he would like you! You punch a locker as you go by, narrowly missing Tavros's face. Gamzee, Tav's best friend, gives you a hard look while you walk away.

* * *

Your name is John Egbert and you are ashamed of yourself. You just ruined all your chances. All of them. Why else would Dave kiss you? Because he wanted to show brotherly love? No! He was kissing you because... because... You actually don't know why. But you hope it was because he thought of your relationship as something more.

_Looks like this ship sunk beautifully_, you thought as you stalked off to English. Oh, this would be so fun.

Once you got into class, you sat in your usual seat, but Dave wasn't there. Where was he? Was he really that angry that he wouldn't come to class? Or was he not even angry? Just embarrassed that he kissed the loser in the hallway? It was probably the last one. No matter how hard you tried, you just couldn't break out of the friend-zone, could you?

* * *

**Yep. I'm evil. John is stupid. I know this story seems like a game of Cat and Mouse between Dave and John, but it'll end soon. I think the story is a little more than halfway through, so we only have a little bit more to go. Sadly. :( **

**Read and Review!**

**Until Next Time,**

**Kato **


	10. Hiatus

**Hey guys, this isn't a chapter, but it's important. So continue reading it. I'm putting ****_Denial _****on hiatus for a while. I'm considering rewriting the last chapter, too. I'm just going to take a moment to thank everyone for sticking with this story for as long as they did. I also want to thank everyone who helped me actually publish on this site. **

**I'm really sorry for the late notice, but I hope you will read the next chapter when it's uploaded. I'm going to try to finish my one-shots, as well as my two-shots During this hiatus. **

**Thank you so, so much.**

**Until Next Time, **

**Kato**


End file.
